Advent 2013 Day 2

“The Only People whose soul can truly magnify the Lord are people like Elizabeth and Mary – people who acknowledge their lowly estate and are overwhelmed by the condescension of the magnificent God.” – John Piper, “Good News of Great joy” Daily Readings for Advent (Day 2). Read Luke 1:46-55

 I struggle so much to get to the place where I am overwhelmed by the condescension of the magnificent God.  I want my soul to truly magnify the Lord.  But, I have big dreams right?  I mean, why can’t God use me to write like John Piper?  Why can’t I be used by God to do great things?  Why?  Why not me? 

Have you ever asked yourself questions similar to these?  Why does so and so get chosen to do such and such but I fail?  What about me?

Well, here’s the problem “Me”.  What about, “me”?  Why can’t “I”?  Instead of desiring greatness, I want to desire holiness.  I want to desire humility.  I want to desire God.  I want everything I desire to be for Him and to magnify Him, not me.  I want God to be in control of how I order my days but, honestly, I am. 

I told my son today that I want God to show up and I want Him to meet with me daily. When I pray I want Him to be the one speaking through me.  I want Him to lead.  As I said this to my son, I heard God’s Holy Spirit speak to my heart.  He said, “Then meet me on MY time, not yours. I want to be first. That means you meet with me before you do anything else.  If you will meet me when I say, then that is where you start letting go and letting me lead things.”

Every morning, I get up and get busy doing things.  I keep putting my prayer time off.  Then, in the middle of the day I “might” squeeze that in.  I start out with good intentions but it takes me a while to wake up and get focused in the morning so I put off my prayer time for after breakfast and coffee.  But then I get distracted and I just keep putting it off.  I need to do it even if I am unfocused and half asleep.  If I am too “foggy” I can always come back later and try again, but I need the first thing I do every day to be falling on my face in humility before the Lord. 

Humility is something else I struggle with.  I have said before that all too often I find myself asking for things and striving to praise because I know I’m supposed to.  I want my praise to be a natural overflow from a heart that is right with God.  I want to be so humble that I don’t feel right asking Him for anything at all and I can’t do anything but praise Him. That’s where I want to be. But, apart from Christ I can’t do anything at all, not even desire God. 

This is my praise….

I praise God for showing my lack of humility and that there is nothing I can do about it.  I praise Him that He alone can bring me down so He can lift me up. Then I will I realize how great He is and how much I need Him!  I praise Him for each time that He brings me to the end of myself and how He helps me to see the areas in my life where I am not surrendering to Him.  These days, that area is ironically in my dependence on Him to lead me in prayer.  I can do all things by His strength but apart from Him I can do nothing.  This means I can’t even desire humility, grace, or God.  It starts with obedience. Whether I feel like it or not, not matter how tired or unfocused I feel, I need to get on my face before the Lord…FIRST and DAILY…even if only just to wait. His word tells me that If I love Him, I will obey Him.  He has called me to meet with Him FIRST.  So, that is what I am going to do.  This is the only way things will change.

I want my soul to magnify the Lord like Elizabeth and Mary’s.