Stop the Hurt

Hurting people hurt people. They can be difficult to love because they have likely not experienced the kind of love that enables them to be loving. The sad part is that it is a cycle that snowballs. People are afraid to love the hurting person because the hurting person hurts people. She is often eaten up with bitterness and very angry.  She is afraid to love and builds up walls to protect her heart.  She needs to feel safe before the walls will come down. This is why she hurts people, because she is lonely, afraid and feels worthless.

If we as children of God, can just push through and start loving more, maybe there would be less people hurting. People are far too critical and judgmental of one another (this is not excluding myself at times as well)…especially and sadly…people of faith (who are the example setters). I am not excluding myself when I say this. I have felt loved and I know how I respond…and I have been deeply wounded and I know how I have responded….and it hasn’t always been right. I am guilty. I confess. Would you? Too many people in the church are hurting. The odd thing is, they come to church seeking refuge. Do we inflict more injury or are they finding that refuge to heal that they so desperately need?

I don’t have a solution for this, but I know One who does and we can only find it on our knees…together…as a community. It’s time to confess our pride…one of God’s most hated of sins because it is at the root of most sin. It’s time to be transparent as we are called to live. It’s time to admit to ourselves that we don’t reach out because we fear. We fear discomfort. I know this because I battle it myself. So, the hurting are left to hurt and continue to hurt others. We need to come together on this. I think it is at the core of so many issues among believers…issues with depression, abuse, divorce, apathy, division, suicide, homocide…the list goes on. Hurting people don’t need to be addressed with a laundry list of faults. They already put themselves down all day every day. They need to see that they have good in them. They need to see their value in Christ. They need to know that they have a purpose and what that purpose is. Then they need to know the steps to move in that direction. This will help them to look inside themselves and hold themselves accountable to the Word of God that change might begin to take place.  That is why we are called to be salt and light! Instead we constantly point out flaws that we have no right pointing out.

We must stop Bible thumping and start being Jesus to those who are hurting. The Word of God will speak for itself. It doesn’t need to be pounded into anyone. I have had to learn this the hard way. The word of God is a double edged sword (Heb. 4:12). We do not need to be so quick judge others so much as we need to try to understand and approach the situation with care. We only need to  lead them to the Word of God and let IT be their judge.  We need to let the Word of God into our own  hearts in order to convict us and others who hurt toward change. It has been my experience that people who are hurting are more willing to reach out to others who hurt…but because they haven’t experienced healing, sometimes it does more harm than good. We have to get the hurting to a place of healing. They in turn will be great instruments of healing toward others.  We have got to stop hurting them even more.

About Me (and u)

About Me (and u).

via About Me (and u).

Pondering the Past

I pondered today…what if I awakened tomorrow and I could forget all the

damaging things anyone ever said or did to me in my past?

How different would I be…

if I started fresh with no memories that would cause me to feel

like it is pointless to dream because failure is my destiny?

Would I dream bigger?

Would I strive harder?

Would I believe stronger?

Would I accomplish more?

Would my dreams stand a better chance of becoming a reality?

 

The past is a thief of the present….and a manipulator of the future.

Since it is unlikely that I will wake up tomorrow and forget it…

I must choose to use it.

I must learn from it.

I must grow from it.

I must leave it behind me.

Get Real

Transparency…it gets me in trouble. Being real is very intimidating to others who are not. It opens me up for criticism and ridicule.  They often attack and often I get hurt. But, in spite of that, I don’t wear a mask. I won’t wear a mask. I don’t put on a facade. I am genuine. You get what you get. This is something I actually like about me. (It doesn’t always win me a lot of friends but the ones I do get are just as real as I am).

It is biblical to be transparent but it involves risk. Transparency allows people to see your imperfections, your flaws, your vulnerabilities and more. It’s like telling a prankster you are afraid of spiders. You know what will happen! But if you tell him they don’t bother you, it is likely he won’t try to play that kind of a sick joke on you. However, there is a good chance a spider may appear and the truth will surface.

On the flip side, allowing others to see your weaknesses gives them an opportunity to reach out and help you to be stronger.  Friends may be few, but they will be real. Nobody has ever been more transparent than Jesus Christ.  He is the example we have to follow.  His transparency brought about so much suffering at the hands of men and so much glory in the presence  of God. When all was said and done, His disciples (friends) laid down their very lives for Him

I have discovered that no matter how much I try to hide the truth or to pretend to be something I’m not, the real me eventually surfaces. There is no stopping it. I can either embrace who I am and be real, knowing it may bring about rejection by some. Or, I can be fake and try to impress people to win a popularity contest and have a bunch of friends who are as fake as I am. Problem is, eventually, the truth will surface and fake friends turn away. Disappointment is inevitable.

I cannot be effective reaching out to others if I am not real in how I present myself. I need not fear rejection or judgement (but sadly, I do) because those who judge or reject me for being genuine have a bigger problem than I do! I need to fear God alone. In doing so, I can’t be anything but real.

To love God is to obey Him. He calls us to be transparent but so few of us really are. I challenge you to go before Him and ask for the courage to be real, open, and honest about you, your life, and your struggles. There is no more effective way in which to help another tear down some nasty walls and be set free from their own prison. Be transparent.

Proverbs 11:3 The integrity of the upright guides them, but the unfaithful are destroyed by their duplicity.

Prayer is Our Only Offense

 Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful.

Colossians 4:2

Warfare. The battle always present in the mind. Every battle begins in the mind and has sin at its root…every single one. This can be as simple as battling a choice to eat healthy or poorly to as huge as starting a war between nations. It all starts very small. It all starts the same way…with greed, selfishness, lust….sin. The battle can be won before it’s ever fought if we just turn to God as our Commander in Chief and do what He tells us to do. Choose to follow Him. Seems simple enough doesn’t it? Too bad there is another commander battling for us to follow him. He is charming and deceptive. He is not a scary ugly red guy with a pitchfork and spiked tail. He is delicious, he is attractive, he is alluring, he is charming but this is a facade. His ugly is far beyond anything we can imagine and our destruction is his ultimate goal. Our only hope is on our knees before God…constantly…CONSTANTLY.…whether in our hearts or physically…we have to humble ourselves before God every moment because the minute we try to stand without Him we will fall prey to the enemy. Wars can be won by prayer alone, wars can be avoided by prayer alone. Our greatest weapon is prayer.